Thursday, February 28, 2008

Morning...

I don't have to be at work until 10:30 today. Unfortunately, I am an persistant early riser and have been awake since the wee hours. I tried to stay up late last night, but it didn't happen.

I watched Project Runway last night and am still conflicted on the outcome and the inconsistency of the judges. While they loved the edgy, impracticality of previous winners, they seemed to embrace the more traditional and classic last night. It all seemed so predetermined to me. As if, in the last challenge their golden boy had failed them and they had to throw him a lifeline. If his "walk-off" entries had been half as edgy and/or stylish as his competitor, I could have endorsed the judges' decision.

Sadly, I cannot.

So, I sit here stewing over something I saw on television 10 hours ago while cooking my scalp in an effort to conceal the ungodly amount of gray hair on my head.

Monday, February 25, 2008

The Awards

I watched the Independent Spirit Awards on Saturday and the Oscars on Sunday. Rainn Wilson hosted the Indies and was far funnier than Jon Stewart, who really only had a couple of good laughs. I really miss Billy Crystal! Of course, I know that Jon Stewart only had 9 days to work with the writers, so I'm giving him a bye.

Rainn Wilson's auditions for each of the films nominated for the ISA were hilarious. His scene as Juno dancing with Jason Bateman had me on the floor. The most disappointing moment in the ISAs for me happened when the cameras kept going to Bruce Greenwood, a longtime favorite of mine, who seemed bored and angry throughout the ceremonies.

Now...on to the Oscars. First, a critique of the clothing. I loved the ladies in red. Katherine Heigl, Helen Mirren, Miley Cyrus, Hiedi Klum, and Anne Hathaway. I loved Jessica Alba's purple maternity frock and Jennifer Hudson's white Grecian number. George Clooney looked amazing as ever, and Javier Bardan looked stunning.
I'm a huge fan of Kristen Chenoweth and could find no fault in her LBD. I wished Amy Adams had chosen something more colorful or of a more lush fabric. Oh! and speaking of LBDs...The amazing Hillary Swank!

My list of those I found less appealing? Well, I do love Daniel Day-Lewis, but thought he looked as bad as Johnny Depp, and his wife looked like she had whipped up her dress herself from old drapes--shades of an old Carol Burnett sketch. Cameron Diaz and Renee Zellwiger have yet to figure out that pale women shouldn't wear pale colors. And what was going on with Renee's hair?

I found the award ceremony itself quite boring and kept switching over to watch the conclusion of Pride and Prejudice. (I'm sorry, but documentaries and animated shorts can't really compare to Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy.) I was surprised by the Best Actress winner...I thought Julie Christie was a lock...and best supporting actress. Oh! I'm sorry! I forgot to mention Tilda Swinton in the fashion reviews. I keep trying to forget I ever saw her, but OMG! What was she thinking? NO makeup and a FUGLY dress and hair that I could have done better!

My favorite part of the ceremony was the clips of previous ceremonies and interviews with previous winners.

Did I miss Brad Renfo in the "dead celebrities" clip? Or was he left out? Was he forgotten in the hoopla over Heath Ledger?

All in all, not the best Oscars.

Friday, February 22, 2008

IT'S FRIDAY!!!!!!

And I am feeling much better. I've been fighting off walking pneumonia and feel almost normal...finally.

I've got to get a lottery ticket on my way home this evening. The hated soda machine that takes my money and seldom surrenders a thirst quenching tasty treat today gave me not one, but two Diet Cokes! It's a sign from GOD!

Dad has an appointment next week with a radiologist and things are looking good...he will be having seed radiation. Someone exclaimed that he won't be able to hold small children in his lap for 6 months, to which I exclaimed...his youngest grandchild is 5'6" tall and 145 lbs....don't think it will be a problem.

A review of the week in television...

Saturday...I watched a lot of Animal Planet.
Sunday....Pride and Prejudice (Colin Firth, wet, walking, wonderful...)
Monday...Good thing I had a book.
Tuesday...Biggest Loser
Wednesday...my ultimate TV night...America's Next Top Model and Project Runway. What a night! The new group of girls on ANTM I found lacking...no striking beauties.
PR--I love the final four. Who should I root for?
Thursday...finished the book...Magic Bites...for my fantasy group that meets next Friday.
Tonight is the season finale of Monk.

All in all, I'm so glad the writers' strike is over.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

What the ??????

I received the following email from a co-worker today.

can either one of you guys swap a Saturday with me , I work you date you work mine , I am trying to move on Feb 23 , if not I understand ?

No lie.

That's all I'm sayin'.

Chinese Take-out

I forgot to bring my lunch today, so I foolishly stated out loud that I was going to the nearby Chinese take-out. My co-workers were on my like papparazzi on a celebutante.

I typed up each order, calculated the tax, and put each person's money in a separate envelope with a name on it. Then I tried to fax the list to the restaurant, but I kept getting an error message. So I called the restaurant to verify the fax number. This is how that conversation went.

"Sunny China. I take your order."

"I'm trying to fax several orders and am having problems, can I verify your fax number?"

"You want order steamed veggiebles?"

"No, can I have your fax number?"

"You need fax number?"

"Yes, I've been trying to fax a number and it won't go thru."

"You call in order?"

"I have 6 orders, all paying separately. I'd rather fax the order."

"You phone order."

"Okay, here goes. Order # 1...1 large wonton soup."

"Order special #1 and wonton soup."

"No. The first order is for a large wonton soup."

"Oh! No want special #1?"

"NO. Just the wonton soup."

"Okay."

"Second order, 1 chicken lo mein with egg roll."

"Okay."

"Third order, 1 chicken with broccoli and egg roll."

"Okay."

"Order number 4 (OMG! What was I thinking?????) Cashew chicken with hot & sour soup."

"You want special #4...."

"No. I'm very sorry. The forth order is for cashew chicken with hot & sour soup."

"Okay."

"The fifth order is for sesame chicken with egg roll."

"Okay."

"The last order is for two lunch specials...1 beef with broccoli with wonton soup and 1 sweet and sour chicken with egg roll."

"Okay."

"When will this be ready?"

"You come pay now!"

"Okay."

It was with great trepidation that I collected my envelopes and my master order and headed out the door, not really sure what would await me at the Sunny China.

Well the good news is that we only ended up with one too many beef with broccolis!"

Life is good!

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Words I Never Wanted to Hear

My Dad called me at work today to see when would be a good time for me to take off work. Why? He wants me to go to the doctor with him. He had a bad report and the doctor wants him to bring his family in to "examine his options".

I don't want to think about this.

He seemed upbeat and assured me the doctor said they had caught it early. The appointment is next Friday afternoon.

I really don't want to think about this.

I'm PMSing...i.e. moody, weepy, mean, and my boobs hurt. On top of that, I think I have a sinus infection.

I. DO. NOT. WANT. TO. THINK. ABOUT. THIS!

Monday, February 4, 2008

I COULDN'T HELP BUT ADMIRE HER CONFIDENCE

I ran to the Piggly Wiggly on Saturday afternoon to pick something up for dinner. I was at my parents' house, and the Pig in that neighborhood is quite upscale, with a lovely wine department...seriously.

I was standing in the check-out line behind a very cute girl...probably in her late teens...who was flirting outrageously with the handsome young man ringing up her purchases. Now, you may ask, why was this extra-ordinary? Because the items she was purchasing were: an economy pack of tampons, a bottle of Midol, and a bag of Hersheys Kisses. At her age, I would have tracked down the oldest, most myopic looking woman in the place to check me out, but she was flirting while buying these most intimate of items.

Of course at my age, I don't care. I suppose I should be happy to still be having periods...I should, but I'm not.

And since I'm discussing such personal issues I have to bring up something that happened on Friday. I wore the wrong bra to work. The wrong bra...how does one define the wrong bra? Too big, no support, back hurts, straps in wrong place. All of these and a hundred other reasons to be miserable. A good bra is a thing to be treasured and any woman will attest to this fact. It is a magical talisman by which the less blessed create the illusion of bounty and the bountifully blessed can minimize the fullness of natures gifts. It can create structure where none exists, alieve an aching back, and make any blouse look better. It helps us to defy gravity and camoflage the ravages of age. It is a miracle of modern technology in that it weighs almost nothing and yet can support the weight of the world (or a couple of DDs). It can create clevage where none exists. But most importantly, a woman in a pretty, lacy, silky bra possesses a confidence that is measurable. She walks taller, straighter, and sexier. She is a power to be reconned with. Give her matching panties and world best beware!

On the other hand, a pair of panty hose in which the elastic is failing is clearly a tool of Satan!